He turned 5 this past summer. How did I miss it? Of course, he was doted on, it was celebrated, there was a party with friends, and gifts, and cake, but yet, I still missed it. I was there. I was fully present for my son. What I am referring to is how I missed the significance of this milestone¦.of this particular age. You see, as an adoption social worker, it is well known that children 5 and older are significantly less likely to be adopted than their younger counterparts. Especially boys. While I have often internally compared my babies to the babies from China that I work hard to find families for, they were still just that¦..babies. But the fact is, babies find homes. Babies get families. Babies are chosen and wanted.
So, here I sit, once again, thinking of my Murphy, as if he were one of those waiting in a Chinese orphanage. I used to picture him in a crib. But, now that I realize the significance of his age, he would have been better off in a crib. In a crib, he would have had a better chance of being chosen. Now, now that he is over 5, with a ˜defective’ heart that may need prolonged medical treatment, he would wait. Possibly forever. With no family to step forward for him.
I think of Murphy. I think of Murphy, and I find solace in knowing that he is not living in those shoes. But that doesn’t erase the thoughts. The thoughts of a 5-year-old boy, with a ˜bad’ heart, living in an orphanage, waiting. Makes me immediately think of Austin. Austin. Has a heart condition. Murphy. Has a heart condition. Austin. Has a ready smile. Murphy. Has a ready smile. Austin. Extroverted. Murphy. Extroverted. Austin. Loves cartoons. Murphy. Loves cartoons. 2 boys. 2 boys with so many similarities. 2 boys born into completely different circumstances. But 2 boys nonetheless.
Austin is my Murphy in another body. He is not a diagnosis. He is not an age. Austin is an amazing, joyful, hyper, sweet, snotty, sassy, shy, loving, naughty, obedient, sometimes disobedient, feisty, sensitive, active, creative, little boy, whose odds of being ˜chosen’ went down immensely when he turned 5 this past February. Don’t let him be a statistic. Give him the family he so deserves.
Austin is eligible for a $5,000 Bright Futures Grant through Madison Adoption Associates. Please contact Sarah at firstname.lastname@example.org for more information, or visit us on our website at www.madisonadoption.org.