When did you participate in MAA’s hosting program?

We participated in MAA’s hosting program in summer of 2016 (China) and summer of 2019 (Colombia).

How old was the child(ren) you hosted?

AiJun was 9 when we hosted him, Addie was 13, Melany was 11, and Phillip was 9 when we hosted them.

What types of things did you do with your host child(ren) during the hosting session?

With AiJun we mostly stayed home and/or just did what we would normally do. AiJun was quiet and just went with the flow. Our son joined the military while AiJun was with us so we went down to St Louis to see him get sworn in. We went to the city museum in St Louis with AiJun- he loved it! We also hosted a family reunion while he was with us and went to a museum. AiJun loved swimming in our pond and going on boat rides in the river. We also took him to Chinese restaurants. Our Colombian kids were much more verbal and active. We went to a Mexican restaurant several times and also found a Spanish speaker (teacher at the school) to meet with us a couple times to make communication easier. We used google translate on my phone, but having a translator was super nice as sometimes google translate didn’t translate accurately. I was working during that time, so friends had background checks done so they could watch the kids while I worked. Our pastor and his wife took them to the zoo, another friend took them to a hands on kids museum, another friend had the kids over to swim in  her pool. We played games that did not require language or required very little language – charades, uno, Dutch Blitz, etc.The Colombian kids had a shorter hosting stay – 2.5 weeks – so we didn’t have as long as we did with AiJun’s host visit. One weekend was spent in Champaign at the MAA picnic that all the host kids were required to attend, the other weekend was spent at our local county fair. While in Champaign we went to a water park. The kids really liked everything they got to do!

What was the best part of hosting?

The best part about hosting was to get to know the kids and learn about their culture. It was fun learning about the food they eat and the holidays they celebrate. The Colombians were especially eager to share with us their experiences. 

What was the most challenging part of the experience?

The most challenging part for me was trying to make the visit fun while staying on top of laundry and house cleaning haha! One day I did ask them to help, which they did, but you feel like they are guests and you want to show them a fun time. However, two and a half weeks is a long time to only have fun!

How did the experience impact your entire family (other children in home)?

The hosting experience impacted our other children in good ways, even if they did not know it then. They learned to look to the needs of others for a few weeks and share our attention. 

What advice would you give to a potential host family?

I would advise another host family to make an itinerary before they come. Find a translator near you. Don’t be afraid to ask the kids to help with chores. Ask about their culture and be interested in what they tell you – don’t just be eager to share American traditions. Learn about and be prepared to make food from their country while they are here -they will love it! Also- if you have kids at home, let them know that things are going to be crazy and your attention will be split between them and the host child/children. Ask your children to help you by asking the host child/children good questions about their country and making them feel at home. You are hostesses as a family, it is a group effort! 

Would you do it again?  Why or why not?

Yes we would do it again. However, we have zero space to put a host child because we have adopted the four kids! We have two bio kids still at home so we have six kids at home. We do not have enough bedrooms for any more people unfortunately, even for a host visit. I try very hard to promote it in my church every summer that there is hosting! Hosting has blessed our life. It is such a wonderful experience to be able to advocate for a child in need or meet the child that you are considering adopting. Like I said, adoption has captivated our hearts and made us better people!

We are currently seeking host families in Utah, Illinois, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania to host a waiting child in July 2023. To learn more about the program, please visit our website or email misty@madisonadoption.org.

We have participated in hosting with Madison since 2018, first as a helper family, advocating for the children and the program, and then in 2019 we welcomed our first host child home. We have hosted each year since then, each a very special child and a phenomenal experience for our family and life changing for all involved! We have always chosen to host children from Colombia because we are very familiar with the country, the culture, and the children, as each of our 2 daughters were adopted from this beautiful country. Our story is a bit different because our hearts are called to host children with high special needs, major medical needs, due to our first daughter’s hosting and eventual adoption story. She was brought to the US as part of an orphan hosting program, as a high special needs child with an unknown life prognosis. God brought us to her on her final day of the hosting trip and immediately confirmed that she was our daughter, and 9 months later, she was placed in our arms forever! Since that blessing, we have been committed to becoming host parents to advocate for other children with special needs; providing them the same chance that our daughter’s host family gave her!

During hosting we enjoy lots of general playtime at home, just enjoying family life with our children, in a loving, busy home; simple activities and daily home life that most orphans have not experienced. Children thrive on routine and structure so we strive to keep that while they are here, but do take some fun outings, like the zoo or parks. If needed we may attend a visit to the dentist, eye doctor, or pediatrician to gain some basic knowledge of his/her health-our doctors have always donated their service for our host children.

The best part of hosting is getting to know this beautiful child beyond the paperwork file! Watching them light up at the sight of fun toys and experiences like swimming, trying new foods, and coming to cuddle up with people who were just strangers days ago. Their resiliency in this experience and true joy in this opportunity is such a blessing!

The worst part is getting so little time with these sweet children, it seems like you just get to see them fully comfortable enough to open up in those couple weeks, and then it’s time to put them back on an airplane. 

Our entire family, including our 3 children plus our extended family-grandparents and even great grandma, are actively involved in this experience and truly, we all look forward to it every summer. It’s the best part of our summers! We consider it a great blessing to be called to adopt and to host orphaned children. Welcoming more children into our home, as short-term as it may be, allows us to play a role in their journey to finding their family, bringing them home. While growing our hearts and our faith, teaching compassion and understanding and love for all of our differences.

This experience is our calling, your opportunity to be the hands and feet of Jesus, as is His will. Your family will forever be deeply changed by this opportunity, and we pray there will also be one less orphan in the world because of it. We absolutely will continue to host with a focus on special needs advocacy, and our hearts are always open to adoption. We are grateful to Madison for this wonderful program, so professionally organized, but compassionately planned and family focused. 

We are currently seeking host families in Utah, Illinois, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania to host a waiting child in July 2023. To learn more about the program, please visit our website or email anneb@madisonadoption.org.

Bond.  We talk about it a lot in adoption.  How to bond with your newly adopted child, how to promote bonding and attachment, what it means to be bonded.  This one word becomes so complex as parents strive to achieve it through therapeutic modalities, parenting techniques, cocooning, TBRI, and so much more.  But achieve it they must, as bonding is key to the success of every adoption, so we will continue to navigate bonding with our newly adoptive parents for as long as it takes.

So, we’ve established the importance of bonding when it comes to newly adoptive parents and their adopted children.  The complexities of it, especially when establishing a new bond.  But the definition is pretty simple – join or be joined securely to something else.  And while the parent-child bond is crucial, the sibling bond can be just as powerful, if not more, especially when the bonded have been through things together that no child should have to endure.  They are bonded not only by blood, but by circumstance, and through no fault of their own, by trauma.  Though, throughout the chaos, the one thing that has remained stable in their young lives is each other, strengthening that bond even more.  Nola (8) and William (6) are proof of that power of the sibling bond.  They are ‘thicker than thieves’ as they say, and where one goes, the other follows.  The bond these two have is unbreakable.  Which is why it is crucial that they stay together, and be placed in an adoptive family who will embrace them both.  Parents who will not only build their new bond with these precious children, but nourish the precious bond this brother and sister pair already have.

To learn more about our Thailand program please visit our website, or complete an inquiry form and a Madison Adoption Associates staff member will be in touch.

Exploring International Adoption? The Bulgaria Traditional Program might be the right fit for you! In a recent meeting with the Ministry of Justice and our partner organizations in Bulgaria, MOJ shared that there is a dire need for families in their traditional program, as they currently only have 222 families registered! 

In the Bulgaria Traditional Program a prospective adoptive family submits a Dossier directly to the Ministry of Justice for a direct match. Included in your Dossier are the child parameters that you are open to and approved for adopting – such as age, gender, history, special needs, siblings or not. The MOJ will then review your Dossier and refer a match to you of a child(ren) meeting your parameters. Because the Dossier is submitted and reviewed and approved by the MOJ at the beginning of the process, that means the time from match to travel is much shorter! After receipt of referral, you can expect to travel for your first trip to Bulgaria within 8 weeks! And more importantly, it means a child does not have to wait longer than necessary for a family to compile a Dossier.

Frequently Asked Questions about the Bulgaria Traditional Program:

1. Who are the children available? The children available range in age from 1 year through 15 years. Common special needs are developmental delay, cleft lip and palate, history of parental mental health diagnoses, congenital heart conditions, limb deformities, medically healthy sibling sets of two or three children with the older child being under 10, speech delays, seizure disorder, and more.
2. Are siblings available? Yes! There is a great need for families open to adopting sibling sets of two or three siblings, of either gender, with the oldest sibling being around 10 years old. These sibling sets are either medically healthy, or have minor to moderate special medical needs. You will outline your parameters within your Dossier. Families open to sibling groups with the oldest child being 10 in the traditional program can typically expect to receive a referral within 4-7 months after Dossier submission.
3. What is the wait time in the traditional program? The wait time varies based on the child parameters outlined in your Dossier. Families with more openness can expect lessened wait times, whereas families with more limited openness can expect to wait upwards of 2-3 years to receive a referral after Dossier submission.
4. What are the requirements to adopt through the traditional program? Married couples and single women are eligible to adopt from Bulgaria. Generally, older parents will be referred older children. Parents must be at least 15 years older than the child they wish to adopt. There is no specific requirement regarding length of marriage or prior divorces; however, the strength of the current marriage and relationship history is taken into account.
5. What are the travel requirements? Bulgaria supports the belief that an adoptive family should be familiar with their child’s heritage. Thus, both parents should travel to the country for both trips. Bulgaria requires that adoptive parents make two trips to complete the adoption. Once a referral is received and accepted, the family will travel to Bulgaria to meet the child. This trip requires 5 days in Bulgaria, plus travel time. A final decision will then be made and if you choose to proceed, the adoption process will begin in Bulgaria while the immigration/visa process (I-800) proceeds in the US. After both countries have completed the necessary steps, final travel to Bulgaria to receive the child and complete the immigration/visa process will be scheduled. This second trip also requires 5 days in Bulgaria, plus travel time. MAA will work closely with our foreign partner to arrange all of your travel appointments in Bulgaria.

Watch this video for a brief overview of our Bulgaria program. Interested in learning more? Please complete our Prospective Adoptive Parent form and MAA’s Family Engagement Coordinator will be in touch to answer all of your questions!

I attended my nephew’s high school graduation last week.  He’ll be 18 in a few weeks, and of course, he has life all figured out.  He has hopes, and he has dreams.  And he’s going after them.  He’ll officially be ‘an adult,’ and is ready to fly off from the nest to start making a life for himself.  I think back to those days when I felt the same.  ‘This is it…..I’m free to do what I want!  FREEDOM!’  I was off on my own, experiencing so many changes and firsts.  But the one thing that didn’t change was my safe place to land – home.  And not just when I needed to do laundry or wanted a free meal, but a place to go when I needed rest – physical and emotional rest.  A place to go when I needed encouragement and support.  A place to go where the people knew exactly what to say.  A place to go where the people always knew ME and my heart, even when I was figuring my own self out.  Home.  And it didn’t end when I turned 19, or 20.  Home has been my safe place to fall throughout my 20s, my 30s, and even now into my 40s.  And now, as I navigate Motherhood, the biggest thing I want my boys to walk away with then they turn 18 is that they will always have a safe place to land with us.  No matter how old they are.  No matter how successful.  No matter what.  Home = Safety.  Always and Forever.

I found myself thinking of Antonio throughout my nephew’s graduation ceremony.  Approaching his 18^th birthday in a few short months.  Approaching ‘adulthood.’  Off on his own.  FREEDOM.  But the difference between him and 18 year old me, between him and my nephew, is he doesn’t have a safe place to land.  He’ll truly be on.his.own.  With nowhere to go.  For the little things like laundry and food.  But more so for the bigger things like encouragement and support.  For feeling valued and safe. 

Madison staff has met and spent time with Antonio and Arlo (Antonio’s 10 year old brother).  They describe both boys as sweet, caring, and kind.  They have heard directly from Antonio and Arlo about their strong desire for a family.  Their strong desire for a safe place.  And their strong desire to stay together.

Please help us find Antonio’s safe place to land before it is too late.  We need a miracle, as time is running out.  We need a home study ready family (or one who could update a home study FAST).  We need a family willing to RUN to Antonio and Arlo so that these brothers can stay together, and have a safe place to land forever.

If you are interested in learning more about Arlo and Antonio, please complete our Prospective Adoptive Parent form, or email Catherine@madisonadoption.org. Madison Adoption Associates is offering a $9,000 grant* to the qualified family who commits to these brothers.

*Deducted from MAA’s agency fee of $14,000 for siblings, making the total agency fee $5,000. Grant will be deducted from Dossier invoice.

It is with a heavy heart that we share about the passing of an incredibly special boy – the world lost an angel on January 9, 2022 when Luke passed away. Luke holds a special place in the hearts of all of us at MAA. We advocated for Luke for years. On several occasions we came very close to finding him a family! But we never quite made it to securing his forever. Then COVID hit, and we were no longer able to advocate for any waiting children.

While we never met Luke, we knew through colleagues that he was a sweet, kindhearted, gentle soul who loved to love, and loved to be loved. Thanks to our amazing friends at Shepherd’s Field Children’s Village, Luke was able to experience the love of a family throughout his short life. Maybe it wasn’t a traditional family, but it was his family nonetheless. While we are so grateful that Luke lived somewhere where he was adored until the very end, the sadness is still very real knowing that Luke never got to experience his forever family. He would have blessed them beyond measure.

In honor of Luke, we are humbled to announce Luke’s Legacy – an MAA grant for older boys.* Older boys often wait the longest for a family, yet we know so many wonderful boys like Luke are waiting and hoping for someone to take a chance on them. This $1,500 grant (in addition to MAA’s $500 grant for children 8 and older) will be available to qualified families who submit a Letter of Intent, which is approved by the country, for a boy in any of our programs who is 12 or older.

Luke, we so wish we had found you your forever family, but we pray you can rest easy knowing that your spirit will live on in this grant, and allow families to bring home older boys for years to come, in your name.

If you are interested in learning more about adopting an older boy, please visit our website, or email Lindsey Gilbert at LindseyG@madisonadoption.org.

*The Luke’s Legacy grant is available to MAA families whose LOI is submitted (and later approved by the country) for a boy 12 or older on or after February 15, 2022. The grant is offered based on the age of the child at time of LOI submission. One grant per sibling group. MAA grants cannot take the agency fee total below $4,000 (single child) or $8,000 (sibling group). The Luke’s Legacy grant is not available to MAA families who are already matched, nor is it available if the child turns 12 after LOI approval but before adoption completion.

We are honored to be able to share Ivy’s story with you.  We would especially like to thank Mary and Bryan S., Ivy’s parents, for not only opening their own hearts to a child with complex CHD, but also for their willingness to share their precious Ivy with us.  Thank you, Mary, for your beautiful words¦

Honoring our Hero,

For those of you who are new to our story, our precious Ivy Joy went home to Jesus on March 20, 2017. Ivy had a complex heart defect with many complications and many miracles to follow. She came home at 21 months, unrepaired and very sick, but more importantly, incredibly wanted and incredibly loved. She would undergo 5 open heart surgeries in 10 months, have set back after set back, and miracle after miracle. She just never stopped fighting and she never stopped smiling. Friends, when our girl could have said, ‘why me?’, she said, ‘How blessed am I?’  Honestly, she never ever complained or felt sorry for herself. She woke up every morning, choosing JOY in spite of her circumstances. She is such a special child and she knew it, boy did she know it!!!! I know our girl is alive in heaven, singing with the angels, dancing with all the other precious children whose mommies and daddies also had to say goodbye for now, all too soon.

When I left for China to bring our precious 5-year-old daughter Charlotte home, my biggest fear was that my plane might crash and Ivy would no longer have me to mix her medicines, remember all the right snacks to take with us for her ongoing cardiology appointments, or care for her the way I do. I prepared the girls Easter baskets before I left, telling our older daughter where they were in case anything happened to me. The last thing on my mind was the thought of me, having to learn live life without Ivy.

On March 20, 2017, just hours after meeting Charlotte in China, our baby girl, the light of our lives, took her last breath at home and took her very first breath in heaven. Our lives were turned upside down in one second and I am here to tell you, we continue choosing joy because she taught us how. So, we continue to strive each day to make her proud of us as we count the days till we see her and hold her again. It is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I don’t like it, but she taught me well and Jesus made a way for us to be together again so I have so much to be thankful for. He never promised she’d make it past her first surgery, but she did. I vowed to Him the day she came out of her first open heart surgery on ECMO that if He took her home that night, I’d still praise Him, I’d still thank Him, for the blessing of being her mommy even for just a few months. Well, with miracle after miracle, Ivy did come home. And we snuggled and giggled and grew and laughed and loved and learned so much from her for 5 precious years. Oh how I miss every single thing about her. It is new grief every single day and new mercies get us through every single morning.

I traveled to China on March 18^th for a March 20^th gotcha day. I was so very blessed to have had a friend traveling with me on this trip. And I will never forget just laying on my bed, screaming out in pain and agony and complete brokenness. She came to me, so completely broken and scared and worried and she said, ‘honey, what do you want to do? whatever you want, however you want to go about it, no one will judge you, everyone will understand that there is no wrong or right here.’

And without even having to think, with the power of the Holy Spirit and the gift of all the modeling by example Ivy Joy had done for me over the 5 years I was blessed to have her on earth, I answered.

I said, ‘Kim, Charlotte waited 5 years to have a family, she did nothing wrong, and there is no way that Ivy would have any part of me leaving her in China. I am Charlotte’s mom as much as I am Ivy’s. And what I want is to get home to my family as fast as anyone could ever fathom, with Charlotte holding my hand. I want God to move mountains for me to get home tomorrow, so I can grieve with my family and see my baby for the last time, even if it’s just her shell.’

And so, with my friend’s non-stop work, and with the efforts and kind hearts of both the Chinese and American consulate, and the constant help and support of Madison Adoption Associates, Charlotte and I made history and finalized her adoption the next morning, and came home. My poor girl was so confused and scared watching this new mommy of hers cry so much. And it got even more frightening when we arrived to a group of 8 more people crying and grieving. But she was grieving too, so we quickly bonded, as we all understood what loss felt like. The beauty of our grief was that we had each other to grieve with and at that moment, it was the only thing that mattered.

February is such an important month in our home! February is Congenital Heart Defect Awareness month and February is the month that we adopted Ivy and she became our beloved daughter! We met on February 13^th (her gothcha) and on Valentine’s Day, February 14^th, we signed all the China documents that made it official. How perfect that her family day was on Valentine’s Day!!!

I will end this with a testimony of the gift our daughter was to us. If I had a chance to do life over, with this same scenario and this same outcome, I would have my hands in the air with the biggest YES just to be her mommy for however long God gave me! YES it was worth it, YES it was hard, YES it is hard, and YES life is so much better because she was in it. Easy is just that, easy. Easy would have meant that there was no Ivy Joy. No being Ivy’s family. We know that true joy is chosen. It is searched for and chosen. We give thanks for so much more than just things that can be seen. We have experienced the richness of life, we have seen miracles, and we have watched doctors scratch their heads as Ivy recovered from things that she was not expected.

We have seen heartache that we wish NO ONE would ever have to experience. Every moment, every high and every low, was so worth it!

Reading the file of a child with heart defects is scary stuff, it’s not for the faint at heart, it comes with no promises. But behind that file, is just a little child who needs a family! We had no idea how much we needed Ivy, but it was certainly more than she needed us. Our YES was hard; but with our YES came unspeakable joy!

Don’t let HARD scare you. Hard teaches, hard grows us, hard matures us, and hard causes us to reach out for the only hand that will always be there for us, today, tomorrow, yesterday, and infinitely.

With Love and Joy,

Mary

MAA is humbled to offer the ‘For Ivy’ $1,000 grant to families adopting any child with complex CHD.  And while we are featuring Ivy’s story in February in honor of Heart Awareness month, we are happy to offer this grant year-round, as we stand by all children with CHD like Ivy, and strive to get them all home as soon as possible.  To meet some of the children we are advocating for with complex CHD, please visit our website.

If you are not in a position to adopt, but would still like to help bring these children home, please consider donating to the For Ivy grant so that we can offer this grant for years to come!